The Next Logical Step... Having a Critter!

"We figured there was too much happiness here for just the two of us, so we figured the next logical step was to have us a critter."








After nearly fifteen years of practicing, next year (which is next month already) my husband Bill and I are going to start trying to conceive.


I visited my doctor for health screenings and a pep talk, recently. I did great on the health screenings, and now I'm popping prenatal vitamins daily to get a head start on everything (and I guess to see what happens when you add a stool softener to an already fiber-rich diet).

I am a bit apprehensive about all of this; I spent most of my life declaring that I did not intend to reproduce, so I feel somewhat unprepared. I'm sure everything will work out for the best, though, people have been doing it for eons. Besides, I've read 2.5 pregnancy books already. I'm going to be a qualified OB/GYN myself before this over.

Things that are on my mind now...

1. Did I wait too long? I don't seriously feel like I have waited too long. I'm thirty-four. Most of my female friends and acquaintances were my age or older when they started having children. The only concern I have is that if there are any infertility issues, I may regret having waited this long. Then again, I didn't want to have children when I was twenty-four, or even thirty.
2. Will pregnancy suck? I've heard so many different stories about what it's like to be pregnant. It appears that results will vary, so I'll just have to wait and see. I'm lucky enough to be in good health, so I have that working in my favor.
3. Natural childbirth? I still have to learn more about it. I used to find the idea of pregnancy and childbirth very frightening, but my attitude has changed over the years. Natural childbirth sounds really appealing to me. I like the idea of fully experiencing such a significant event. I'm reading Ina May Gaskin's Natural Childbirth book. I've just started reading it, but already I'm beginning to feel that this will be the right choice for me.
4. Am I cut out for this, really? I adore kids, and I guess the feeling is mutual because I am one of those people children tend to like a lot. Generally, when people see me with kids, they'll say things like, "Oh you're so good with kids, you'll make a great mother." Well, I'm not really all that sure. I'm afraid to even hold a baby under six months old! This is a concern, damn it! On the other hand, the fact that I have concerns is probably evidence that I'm going to do all right. At this stage in my life, I'm still learning that I don't have to be perfect, but that's no excuse not to try! Also, I have Bill, who will be great, as well as friends and family and Wikipedia and Google. It will be okay. Obviously, I've decided to have a child, so in a way this question is irrelevant.
5. What do I want to do with myself (careerwise) before, during, and after the pregnancy? This is a tough question. The truth is, I've been struggling with this since even before I decided that I wanted to have a child. Adding a pregnancy and child to the question makes it even more complicated. I'm going to make figuring this out a priority in the coming months. Again, not to sound all Pollyanna here, but I'm so lucky to have several options available to me, including not working. There are so many people out there who don't have that luxury.

Will becoming a parent change me, and, if so, will the change be for the better?

The truth is there are about a hundred questions going through my mind. When possible, I'll put them here, along with any answers I might find, and so chronicle my transistion from the person I am now to the person I will be, and that person just may be someone's mother.